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Posts tagged ‘messages of connection and love’

Perception – Do We See the Same Thing?

PerceptionEyeThe dictionary’s meaning of Perception:

  1. A) The ability to see, hear or become aware of something through the senses
  2. B) The way in which something is regarded understood or interpreted.

Do we see the same thing? Interesting question … Have you ever looked up at the sky and noticed a shape in the clouds such as a rabbit or angel? While in awe at that amazing sight you share this with your friend standing next to you and they nod absently seemingly disinterested because they can’t see it.

Or, you’re walking through the bush and notice a scent that you just love and ask your friend, “Can you smell that?” You find a blank look on their face as if you’re talking about aliens standing on the path ahead.

These are two simple examples, but in life, there can be major misunderstandings created because of the different perceptions of the individuals involved often causing conflict and frustration.

In psychology, we talk about a frame of reference. Tversky, A. And Kahneman, D (1981) explained it like this; A frame of reference is a complex set of assumptions and attitudes which we use to filter perceptions to create meaning. The frame can include beliefs, schemas, preferences, values, culture and other ways in which we bias our understanding and judgement.

Let’s go back to the rabbit shaped cloud in the sky. What if you held up your arm and pointed your finger towards the shape you saw and asked your friend to place their hand over yours as you drew it in the air? Do you think they would see what you see? Yes, they would and would forever more see shapes in the clouds because you took your time to show them.

Now let’s look at that lovely scent in the bush. In Australia, we have the eucalyptus gum tree, and the leaves smell just like eucalyptus. What if you pulled a leaf off the branch and scrunched it in your hand and then smelt it and encouraged your friend to do the same. Would you feel you have increased their awareness and possibly opened them to experience the beautiful scents as they walked in nature? I’d say yes.

Now there will be some situations where no matter how you communicate the other person will have dug in their heels and will not want to see your perspective. You may have even found yourself in the same situation standing there righteously claiming your truth. I know that I have!

Through a recent personal experience, I wondered why a particular person was avoiding me. I called them and asked, “What’s going on for you, please tell me because I care and love you?” I then listened to what she had to say without interruption for the next fifteen minutes.

Hearing her initially, I was in shock, really that’s what you thought happened. None of what the other person stated resonated. In fact, I felt my body reject it immediately. That person believed they stood in their truth as I knew I was in mine.  We both had an entirely different perception.

There’s a saying about walking in someone else’s shoes… it can help, but there will be times that you may have to agree to disagree or walk away.

It’s a matter of how important that person or situation is, and it’s not about conceding, gloating or feeling frustrated. It’s about compassion for the other knowing that we all have our unique frame of reference, and then having confidence in your truth and intent, and feeling peaceful in that.

Often, I have used my body as the barometer. If it reacts with a complete rejection of the initial statement, then I know this is not true and real for me. If there’s a hesitation, then maybe there’s something in that person’s perception of the situation that I need to look at carefully.

I trust you have enjoyed my blog post.

Until next week,

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Maria Lacey was born in Australia. She has travelled extensively overseas being led by visions, dreams and spiritual guidance.

Maria writes about life (the human and spiritual path), the adversity, learning, musings and triumphs. A successful entrepreneur with over 18 years in her own business, Maria humorously states, “I am my greatest case study.”

Maria is a qualified Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master Teacher, Spiritual Teacher, Meditation Teacher, Healer, Channel and Speaker.

Maria is currently writing her second book about her spiritual travels.

For further information about the author go to: http://www.marialacey.com.au/

Maria’s first book – https://www.amazon.com/One-Path-Many-Lights-Spiritual-ebook/dp/B00YOIOTIS

 

 

 

 

The Unexpected Teacher

Earlier this week I taught a Reiki Level Two certificate course.

When preparing for the day, I’m always well organised. The venue needs to be super clean (and this time it was my home), paperwork organised, food and drink sorted, and the right aromatherapy scent to create a loving sanctuary as people entered the sacred space. Oh, and I always meditate prior so that I am fully in my heart space, grounded and clear with my intention for that day.

This time, something was very different because I had Maggie, my gorgeous and lovable twelve-week-old puppy!

Maggie1

Well, what can I say? It rained the night beforehand, and Maggie during her trips outside to the toilet came in with copious leaves attached to her feet and fur, which fell off as she ran through my home. Then, of course, the wet paw prints on my nicely cleaned floors and the pungent smell of her wet coat. Maggie also seemed more excited than usual, and I found her naughtier than her regular puppy explorations, or at least they were bothering me more.

I found myself a little flustered but felt I didn’t have time to worry about that.

Although the day went well, and Maggie was well received and loved. I felt tense, headachy and tired at the end of the day, which was not my usual self.

I sat and reflected, and by this time Maggie was sound asleep like a beautiful and gentle little fluff ball on my lap, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth 😉

I thought, why was I so tense? Then, I realised it was so important for me to be professional and no matter what was personally happening in my life the student’s experience was of the utmost importance. I also acknowledged I was a little concerned how Maggie would go for the full day. Now she’d been excellent with individual clients that were only one-hour appointments, but in the back of my mind, I had been worried.

I sat with that notion and then had an epiphany. I felt the same when having friends over to my home for a meal. Everything had to be perfect. Smiling, even my garden and outside area had to be spruced up. If I were caught out, I would feel rather guilty and unprepared, which would unsettle me. Hmm, that was old conditioning from my past!

I mean really! Why would a student see me as unprofessional considering they knew Maggie would be attending and openly delighted in the soon to be meeting?

Having this understanding of myself and my actions, I decided to change my thinking for the second day. My home didn’t need to be perfect, and I didn’t race around ignoring little Maggie, in fact, we had an extra-long play, enjoyed a leisurely breakfast together, and while she rested, I checked I was centred, organised and prepared for the day.

Maggie5

It’s hard work having a good play!

Maggie even enjoyed the quiet of sitting and meditating before the student’s arrival, which was a special time for both of us.

The day itself ran smoothly, and when I reflected that night, I felt relaxed and happy and so was Maggie. I knew that my stress and anxiousness the day beforehand had caused her to feel uncertain and stressed herself, hence the behaviour. She was a great little or should I say large and visible reflection for me to view, a beautiful and unexpected teacher.

Unprovoked, my students commented on how they loved Maggie’s presence, and her energy and how it enriched their time in learning and receiving Reiki. They also didn’t notice the occasional damp leaf Maggie carried into the house on her paws, in fact, they delighted in her antics when trying to smuggle in a stick without being noticed and the many other cute behaviours, and especially the puppy hugs.

You know, we are always learning, and we always have choices. Sometimes, we just need to be the observer of ourselves, stop for a moment, feel the discomfort and listen. Then acknowledge and feel empowered to change or let go of what doesn’t serve to love you. Smiling, it would indeed save the angst and the need for others to mirror our internal emotions. Thank you, little Maggie, love you.

After all, there is an imperfection in perfection. It’s all a matter of perception.

Until next week,

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Maria Lacey was born in Australia. She has travelled extensively overseas being led by visions, dreams and spiritual guidance.

Maria writes about life (the human and spiritual path), the adversity, learning, musings and triumphs. A successful entrepreneur with over 18 years in her own business, Maria humorously states, “I am my greatest case study.”

Maria is a qualified Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master Teacher, Spiritual Teacher, Meditation Teacher, Healer, Channel and Speaker.

Maria is currently writing her second book about her spiritual travels.

For further information about the author go to: http://www.marialacey.com.au/

Maria’s first book – https://www.amazon.com/One-Path-Many-Lights-Spiritual-ebook/dp/B00YOIOTIS