Awakening to Self-Love

It was a typical Melbourne Autumn day as I prepared myself in readiness for the day ahead with clients.

All was well in my world, and I loved the thought of once again being of service within my community and empowering others to heal.

My whole life, I’ve felt a strong calling to serve my community and to support those suffering emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

To bring a spark of light to an otherwise dark moment and to ignite hope where hope had faded.

Life has shown me the satisfaction and uttermost joy I receive in giving, but that has sometimes been challenged, my friends.

There have been times when I’ve been out of balance, an unfilled cup whose energy had depleted, and giving was at the expense of myself. 

They talk about the roller coaster of life, and for many of us, we have such a strong inner knowing, and we listen sometimes and give excuses other times. 

Ahh, the human experience.

As human beings, we are imperfect in many ways, and our childhood conditioning, observations and experiences in life have played a significant role in how we perceive our life, whether momentarily, past or future and often from an unconscious perspective.

I have been contemplating this question of self-love, self-nurture, and self-care.

Why do we value others over ourselves?  

Why do we ignore those inner nudges that guide and love us to create from a place of balance and self-care?

Recently, I had an unexpected trip to the hospital by ambulance. I had been getting headaches for a couple of weeks.

It was a Monday evening, and I’d just finished dinner. The headache I’d been ignoring and telling myself, “It wasn’t that bad“, ramped up, forcing me to take notice. I began to experience pain in my chest, which circled around my back and down my arm. My lip started to tingle and go numb. Bizarre hey.

I decided to check my blood pressure, and it was 210/108 … hmm that’s not good, but I didn’t believe my machine, so I changed the batteries and tried again—still the same reading.

I have hypertension but not to that degree. It runs in my family. So, I called the nurses-on-call hotline here in Aussie. They spoke with me and ordered an ambulance immediately, although I felt she might have been overly cautious.

Hmm, still ignoring the signs!

The ambulance arrived, and yes, my blood pressure was that high, and my heart was spiking on the ECG machine. So, straight to the hospital.

To cut a long story short. No, I didn’t have a stroke or heart attack, thankfully, but the moral of this story is that my headaches were my body’s way of shouting out, ‘LISTEN TO ME.’

By ignoring my feelings and the symptoms that followed, something had to wake me up.

Fortunately, I have an extensive toolbox of strategies and practices I could draw upon to support me through those challenging twenty-four hours and, of course, the important reflective process afterwards.

A few days later, as I took off my jewellery in readiness for bed, I was drawn to my wedding ring finger, which was vacant. I felt an inner nudge to put a ring on that finger. Laughing, and probably not for the reason you are thinking right now.

So I popped one of my rings on that finger and instantly felt a warm, comforting feeling flow through me, and I couldn’t help but smile, for my heart responded in kind.

My soul was showing me visually it was time to commit to me!

Commit to self-care and nurture and love me with all my heart.

Smiling, we all know this deep within, and I, of all people, should know this, for I share that with others in my teachings, healings, and counselling daily.

But I won’t shame myself because self-compassion is as essential for myself as it is for others, and to be honest, we’re all on a journey of self-realisation, and mine may just offer some insight for you.

The next day I went shopping for a self-commitment ring, as I call it and purchased an exquisite rose gold, diamond and morganite ring.

It was a bold move as I didn’t have the money, but I felt a deep inner calm, knowing the money would come.

And guess what? Within days it did.

Surprisingly, when I told the young woman who sold me the ring why I was purchasing such a gift for myself, she spontaneously burst into tears. She expressed it was one of the most beautiful things she’d ever heard. I instantly felt her response as tears flooded my own eyes, a beautiful moment of heart connection.

Beautiful soul, we know many things in theory and putting them into practice is not always easy. If I could offer you something here today, it would be – Be kind to yourself, listen intently within, love yourself for every perceivable floor and know that when you do. The reward will be far greater than you can imagine.

Just so you know. I look at my ring daily, and it sparkles its beautiful energy back at me in recognition.

Honestly, I can’t help but smile inwardly and outwardly.

This commitment ring is a conscious reminder to listen and love the whole of me, mind, body, heart, and spirit.

Its reflection brings forth awareness to show up for me, and most of all, it shows me that I am every bit as important as those I give to, and there is the lesson. 

We give with greater love, clarity, and presence when we are true to ourselves and full to the brim. 

As I shared in my book, ‘One Path, Many Lights,’ it’s not about giving others less. Instead, it’s about giving ourselves as much as we give to others.

In sharing this story, I hope it will support anyone who is struggling or giving themselves greater punishment than necessary.

Remember, we all have our moments; for whatever reason, we stop listening to our inner guidance and ignore the signs.

Even through adversity, there is a gift in knowing we can begin again, awaken to self-love, and nurture what is being presented for us to process and heal.

Beautiful soul, know you are loved, and your mind, body, heart, and spirit are worth every bit of your attention.

With love, Maria x

Please reach out if you need support and guidance. As a registered counsellor, spiritual mentor, and healer, you can confidently book an appointment knowing you have someone with experience and compassion who will listen and guide you.

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